In this story, you'll read about Louise. Together, we did a table constellation where she healed the connection with her mother and foremothers – women deeply traumatized by war. What she felt afterward was a new, creative flow that was set in motion. I've documented the session as an example, so you can get an idea of what an online 1:1 session with me could mean for you.

"As I turn sixty-five, it's a fresh start for me," she said. We were in a Zoom session. She is Louise (her real name, and I obtained permission to write her story), a colorful woman with an open gaze and a broad smile. She's very self-aware, with experience in constellation work.

"I am also a healer, besides my job in higher education. I read people's energies, and after retiring, I want to do something with that. I also want to write again. I feel that my enthusiasm has faded. I've come to a standstill, and I don't know why."

I'M AFRAID TO MAKE MYSELF VISIBLE

Together, we listed all her desires and possibilities; how she could build a business and offer services. "Yes, that's it! Completely!" she beamed. And then came the "but."

"I'm afraid," she said, clearing her throat, "I'm afraid to make myself visible." She had a severe coughing fit, and it was not just a coincidence. "There's a lot of weight on visibility," I said, and asked her about some facts from her family history.

"How is your connection with your mother?" Well, that has always been very difficult.

"My mother never wanted to stand in the mother line," she said, meaning that in previous constellation work she had done, the representative for her mother had shown considerable resistance.

"You MUST stand in that mother line!" Louise had exclaimed back then. But, of course, that doesn't help. Love cannot be forced. The flow of love won't restore as long as the trauma that wants to be embraced doesn't feel seen and heard.

TRAUMA REPEATS ITSELF UNTIL SOMEONE IS COURAGEOUS ENOUGH TO FACE IT

I asked Louise to choose figurines for her mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother. And one for herself. Then, we placed the figurines as representatives on the table. In what appeared on the table, the trauma and disconnection became immediately visible: Louise's figurine stood with her back turned to all the women. Her mother and grandmother also faced away from each other and turned away from great-grandmother. And at a distance in the middle, great-grandmother stood, lonely and alone.

"What is your great-grandmother looking at?" I asked. "The ground," said Louise.

"What happened to your great-grandmother?"

"A lot. She lost her husband to illness when the children were very young. Her oldest son was crucified by the Japanese. He was in the resistance. Her daughter and granddaughter were in the Japanese camp."

What sorrow! What a heavy burden to bear. I placed a figurine for the father and one for the son in the constellation. This image was very intense for Louise; it triggered a flow of grief. Tears streamed down her cheeks.

FINALLY, EMBRACING GRIEF

"It was never talked about. My mother acted as if none of this ever happened. She was a true survivor, a strong woman who always did everything alone. Just like me, actually. Now I see how I've also tried to be strong and pretend that nothing ever happened."

"It's okay, just cry. This is necessary. You're the first one to do this, to grieve over what happened." And we gave her pain some space before continuing.

TRAUMA SEEKS A PATH TO LOVE

"Can you see how closed off, lonely, and alone your great-grandmother stands here?"

"Yes, she was a very closed-off woman. I think all this was too painful for her."

"Can you see how lonely it must have been for your grandmother? She lost her father, her brother, and basically her mother, who became unapproachable because of all this grief."

"Yes, I was completely orphaned. Suddenly, there was no one left."

"Can you see how much burden you unconsciously carried and how it sought a way through you to heal?"

"Yes, I see it now. I even see the link to my fear of visibility! The impact of war and the unsafe situation – it's better to hide; in a Japanese camp, it's better not to stand out – I also feel it in my life. It makes perfect sense now."

HEALING RITUAL TO SET YOURSELF FREE OF PAST TRAUMA

Together, we started a ritual of healing: speaking out loud some necessary loving sentences. We left the trauma where it belonged: with great-grandmother, this was her harsh fate. "It belongs to her. You no longer need to carry it. It has been seen now; it's in motion again, and it can flow now."

"I feel like moving the figurines," she said.

And so we did; Louise slowly moved the figurines closer to each other. Great-grandmother could feel safe in the arms of grandmother. Mother in the arms of grandmother.

"How does it feel now to let your mother into your heart? To let yourself be carried by her?"

"I think I can do that now, I believe. I see now how, by shutting herself off, she wanted to protect me greatly! I see now what she did for me. What strength lies within my maternal lineage!"

"And also notice how hard you've worked for all these women. And how strong you are, precisely because you allowed yourself to feel. You confronted the trauma, set the flow of held-back tears in motion. That's very powerful!"

Because this is what trauma wants: to be seen and heard, to heal. Even across generations. It keeps beating at the hearts of family members until someone is willing to see it.

TAKING YOUR PLACE IN YOUR MATERNAL LINEAGE

In the end, Louise found her place in her maternal lineage, supported by all the women behind her. I placed other figurines behind her great-grandmother.

"Your maternal lineage doesn't end here, you know. Countless women stand behind it."

"How wonderful to see this now! Before, it always stopped with my great-grandmother. I never had this awareness that she also has foremothers behind her."

Louise now felt peace in her heart and lightness, and an immense creative energy in her hands. "My hands are tingling with excitement. I want to take action! I no longer need to hide."

YOUR INNER MOTHER AS A KEY TO SAFETY, CONNECTION, AND JOY

Once you can fall into the arms of your inner mother (the mother within you, along with the patterns and beliefs associated with her), you experience better grounding, tranquility, a safe foundation, a home within yourself. Your connection with your inner mother is the foundation of security, necessary to make yourself visible in the world.

WHEN YOU FEEL SUPPORTED, YOU'RE READY TO RECEIVE EVERYTHING YOU DESIRE

Allowing your inner mother back into all parts of yourself happens in stages. It is a deep process, unfolding through all the layers of your inner baby, child, teenager, and adult. With each new phase, deeper connections are formed in your relationship with yourself and with others. It leads to a deeper sense of security and a more profound experience of joy, connectedness and abundance in your life.

"Open your hands, stretch your arms in a welcoming gesture. Now that you feel supported, you're ready to receive everything: abundance, love, a deeper connection with your partner. It's all knocking at your door. Your heart is open."